EXCLUSIVE: Duncan Keith’s Suspension “To-Do” List…

Duncan Keith

You know Dunc - there's a Supercuts just a couple blocks from here...

Tonight’s game between the Chicago Blackhawks and Nashville Predators marks the first game of Hawks’ defenseman Duncan Keith’s five-game suspension.

Keith is the type of player who usually spends 25-30 minutes on the ice every night, so he’s not used to suddenly having this much free time on his hands.

Fortunately, we’ve gotten a look at the “to-do” list made for Keith, that he needs to tick off over the next 5 games:

  • Write “I’m Duncan Keith, not Matt Cooke” on Mike Kitchen’s whiteboard 10,000 times.
  • Read Dan Carcillo’s book, “Penalties for Dummies”.
  • Stand outside Brent Seabrook’s house blasting Peter Gabriel on a boombox.
  • Do more of those weird workouts with the ropes.
  • Hit one of the Blackhawk Band’s live band karaoke gigs.
  • Start selling autographed elbow pads.
  • Gaze at his Norris Trophy and wonder what it would be like to play like that again.
  • Call Brendan Shanahan’s office and  yell , “Raffi Torres!” then hang up.
  • Set up a Shooter Tutor in his driveway.
  • Work on dialing down the crazy interviews a bit.
  • Get a haircut, for chrissakes!
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Filed Under: NHL

About the Author: Spent my formative years breathing in the rarified air of the second balcony at Chicago Stadium. Refined my flair for colorful euphemisms in the blue seats at Madison Square Garden. Now a curmudgeon in the 300 level in the United Center. My musings can also be found at Hockeenight.com...and yes, I muse.

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  1. Dave Morris says:

    Brilliant.