Author Archive for Al Rankin
Al Rankin writes vicariously through others. You probably shouldn't trust what he says, although it's cool to lend him money, he's totally good for it. @Al_Rankin on Twitter
Brian Burke’s NHL Fight Club Rules
The first rule of NHL Fight Club is you do not tweet about NHL Fight Club.
Crosby’s Concussion Symptoms Actually Due to Month Long Bender.
A report that Pittsburgh Penguins star Sidney Crosby has suffered a setback in his recovery from a pair of concussions is being dismissed by his agent as merely ‘being in Halifax during the summer’
Canucks Wellwood & O’Brien Fined For Planning Deep Dish Pizza Crawl
While several of the Vancouver Canucks expressed a hunger for redemption in their return to Chicago it appears that at least two members have appetites that won’t be satisfied by victory alone.
Carcillo: ‘Not a dive. I was abruptly struck by the horrific state of our educational system’
If I’m guilty of ANYTHING it’s caring too much about our schools and universities.
Gretzky, Hull and Modano excited to begin series of bitter, acrimonious disputes.
In a surprise development today, former NHL greats Wayne Gretzky and Brett Hull and current NHL ‘pretty decent’ Mike Modano have announced plans to cast aside years of friendship and mutual respect. The plan, which involves the purchase of the troubled Dallas Stars NHL franchise, is a perfect storm of fiscal instability, conflict of interest and general inexperience.
Marty At The Bat
From 20,000 throats and more there rose a lusty cheer;
It rumbled through the Rockies and made us drop our beer;
It knocked upon the skybox and upon the ice so flat,
For Marty, mighty Marty, was advancing to the bat.
If the Leafs wanted an overpaid slapshot with questionable defensive skills so badly why’d they trade me?
Young offensive defenseman with big shot averages around 50 points a season before his contract expires, gets rewarded with a multi-year extension averaging $6 million per. He initially plays well but soon production fades which draws attention to his lack of defensive skill. Fans revolt and demand a trade. Sound familiar?
How about that totally accidental fire?
Daniel Alfredsson here again, man, is it hot in here or is it just me?
Indeed, what a terrible accident has befallen the referee of last night’s game.
I’d hate for that sort of thing to start happening on a regular basis. Hypothetically speaking, of course.
Battle of Ontario LiveBlog : Starts at 7:00 ET
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Brian Burke Abandons Truculence In Favor Of Warmth & Understanding
Maple Leafs GM Brian Burke has reversed course and is now encouraging his players to find non-violent alternatives to on ice conflicts.
New Book Asks If There Is A Bias Against Newfie Players
‘Port aux Basques? – On Yer Ass! : Discrimination against Newfoundlanders in the NHL’
Hipsters angry Nordiques apparel may no longer be ironic
With the announcement of a possible resurrection for the Quebec Nordiques franchise; thousands of angry hipsters voiced their displeasure at potentially losing a critical part of their ensemble. Vintage Nordiques merchandise, prized for its counter culture appeal and one-up-manship potential has been in dwindling supply since the franchise was moved to Denver in 1994. Prevailing [...]
Point/Counterpoint : Sundin to the Hockey Hall of Fame?
Mats Sundin and a special guest debate Sundin’s possible induction into the Hockey Hall of Fame
Phoenix teens organize Dance-Off to save Coyotes
Drama gripped the Coyote’s bankruptcy proceedings last week as several teens burst into the courtroom and challenged prospective buyer Jim Balsille to quote, “Bring It!”.
Furious 2007 Brian Burke travels through time to berate 2009 Brian Burke
A visibly livid Brian Burke traveled forward in time yesterday to condemn the actions of his future self.
Oh jeez, we’re not going to win a single game all year
There’s an old saw how the biggest thrill in gambling is winning a bet and the second biggest thrill is losing one, essentially explaining why people stick around in situations where they are consistently losing. Ottawa is one of the few teams in the league with a 2-way bandwagon, sure they gain fans on the [...]
Latest Heatley rumour involves 6 Teams, 2 leagues and the ONE guy you didn’t want moved.
Consistently unreliable sources say that Senators GM Brian Murray is close to finalizing a deal that would send disgruntled winger Dany Heatley out of Ottawa in an elaborate 6 way NHL/KHL trade involving the ONE guy you didn’t want moved. Seriously. While not your favourite player per se, the veteran skater was a quietly consistent [...]
Cocaine Dealers in San Jose, Calgary cautiously optimistic
After a 7 year hiatus stemming from substance abuse problems, Theo Fleury has been cleared to play. Both the League and Player’s Association have given Fleury their blessing to attempt a comeback. Fleury, who turned 41 this year, has been practicing in Calgary and has been in touch with several teams concerning a possible tryout. [...]
